The
United States is a nation of immigrants who brought with them
a variety of cultural traditions and practices. This unique
diversity means there is no single uniform "American culture." However,
there are certain standards of behavior which are accepted
in the United States, and they may be different from your own
culture. Some of these customs and attitudes may seem strange
or even contradict some of the accepted behaviors in your country.
The process of learning about American behaviors and values
and coping with them is part of cultural adjustment. Making
this adjustment does not mean you have to give up all aspects
of your cultural identity.
Americans
value the principle of equality of all people, whatever their
race, religion, gender, or ethnic background, believing that
we all should have the same human rights and protections. Most
Americans hold a negative opinion about people who express
prejudice or discriminate unfairly against other individuals.
There are strict laws related to housing and the workplace
preventing discrimination based on race, religion, or ethnic
background.
The
roles of men and women in the United States may differ from
those in your home country. Americans believe in equality of
the sexes and value self-sufficiency and independence for both
men and women. You may find that roles within your family change,
but this is a normal part of the resettlement process. More
than one income is often essential to meet basic expenses.
As a result of this, both parents may need to be employed and
to share child care responsibilities.
Laws
govern some aspects of relationships within the family, such
as those that protect women and children from physical abuse.
Domestic violence laws prohibit the use of physical force against
a spouse or family member. There are also laws which restrict
the use of physical force in disciplining children. Not taking
proper care of children can be considered "child neglect," which
may lead to intervention by child protection agencies.
Many
misconceptions about American life exist, partly because movies
and TV do not present a balanced view of life in the United
States. These media, which usually seek to entertain rather
than educate, do not generally present typical American values,
realities, or behavior. All newcomers to the United States
arrive with some misconceptions about this country. You must
try to be observant, flexible, and open to change. A good beginning
is to ask questions about behavior that puzzles you.
Coping
With Culture Shock
Culture shock includes the normal feelings of being helpless or frustrated in
a country where one neither speaks the language nor understands the culture.
Anyone going to live in a new country will experience a certain degree of culture
shock. Symptoms include:
frustration
at not being able to accomplish daily tasks such as shopping
or taking public transportation,
difficulty
in sleeping or feeling tired during the day,
irritability
or feelings of anger,
loss
of appetite or feelings of indifference.
These
feelings are usually temporary and diminish over time. Many
newcomers to the United States have experienced these feelings
and have become stronger and more capable as they dealt with
them. Ways to cope with culture shock vary among cultures and
individuals. It may be helpful to get back to a favorite activity
or listen to familiar music. One strategy used by nearly all
newcomers is to join groups, particularly mutual assistance
associations formed by and for a particular nationality or
ethnic group.
To
rebuild a life requires patience and hard work. Your days will
be very busy, but the more active you are, and the more you
take responsibility for your own life, the more successful
you will be in resettlement.
Tips
for Everyday Living
Informality Americans
tend to be very informal. In social situations
first names are usually used. In business
situations, last names are used more
often, especially before a formal introduction
has taken place. Many supervisors and
most co-workers may prefer to be called
by their first name. Professional titles,
such as "Doctor" (Ph.D.) are
generally reserved for formal business
situations. The smile is very important
and is used in greeting both friends
and strangers.
Punctuality Time
is highly valued. Americans try to be
punctual and expect punctuality from
others. Making and keeping appointments
is necessary in private and public life.
If you do not make an appointment before
visiting a business office, you may not
be seen, and if you cannot keep an appointment
or you expect to be more than 15 minutes
late, you should call and explain what
has detained you.
Privacy Americans
place a high value on personal privacy,
despite the informality of their lifestyle.
People seldom visit each other's homes
without calling ahead or being invited
first. Financial matters are considered
to be private. It is considered impolite
to ask how much someone earns or what
he paid for his house, car, etc. It
is also considered impolite to ask
personal questions of someone you don't
know or have just met.
Personal
hygiene Most
Americans bathe or shower every day,
brush their teeth often, shampoo their
hair very often, and wash their clothes
frequently. There are hundreds of products-deodorants,
mouthwashes, shampoos, and detergents-especially
formulated for these purposes.
Tipping It
is customary to give a tip of 15% or
20% of the bill to a waiter in a restaurant
or to a taxi driver. It is not appropriate
to give money or tips to a police officer
or any government official as thanks
for assistance.
Smoking Many
Americans do not smoke, and they may
expect others to refrain from smoking
in their homes or places of work. There
are also some restaurants and other public
places, such as stores and public buses,
where smoking is prohibited, or allowed
in one section only.
Alcohol Although
alcohol is consumed in the United States,
there are many laws regulating its sale
and use. These laws vary from locality
to locality, and in some places are very
strict. In all parts of the U.S., driving
while under the influence of alcohol
is a serious crime. Doing so may result
in imprisonment, fines, and/or loss of
your driver's license. Children may not
drink until they reach the age of 18-21,
depending upon locality; nor may young
people under these ages buy liquor in
stores. It is never impolite to refuse
to drink liquor in the U.S.
Safety Although
crime and violence exist in the United
States, the crime rate differs throughout
the country. No matter where you live,
however, you should take basic precautions,
such as locking your home and car, never
carrying large amounts of cash with you,
and knowing which neighborhoods to avoid
at night.
Papers
to carry You should
always carry a copy of your Form
I-94. You should also always carry
the name, address, and phone number
of your resettlement agency. If
you do not speak English, carry
your own telephone number and address,
or the address and telephone number
of anyone you are about to visit.
A
Final Word
Resettlement is a long process. You may need from two to five years to adjust
fully to life in your new community. Try to be observant and non-judgmental,
and set goals for yourself. Honest communication, patience, and a cooperative
attitude toward those trying to help along with respect for the American values
of self-reliance and independence will help greatly in your adjustment. Discovering
a new culture can be enriching and fulfilling as well as challenging.
